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Sarkozy-Bruni Affair Story Another ‘Internet Thought Experiment’

Hooray, basically all news is now just an experiment by some bored professor or newspaper intern to show that you, the person who reads shit on the Internet all day, will happily repeat and re-blog and re-tweet any fucking thing you hear or see, about ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  11 Mar 2010

Forgotten DC Frat-Bar Group Posts Failed Reality Show To Website

It is impossible to remember this now, but a couple of years ago DC was full of douche Republican youngsters with popped collars and confederate-flag bras who congregated at a Georgetown bar to tell jokes about coloreds. And, for many years, the ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  11 Mar 2010

Related Topics: Monty Python,  U.S. Republican Party

Here, Call Your Congress Idiots and Politely Yell At Them

Did Barack Obama sext you today? Us too! If you deleted it already, this is what it says: Call the 202-559-4225 number and you will be connected to the Congressional Switchboard (Eric Massa masturbating) and tell them your district or where you live or ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  11 Mar 2010

Related Topics: Andrew Sullivan,  Barack Obama

The New Detroit: Southern California’s Inland Empire

But the tortoises are okay, aren’t they, Ken? Please tell me the tortoises are okay! Jesus, it’s not much better anywhere else. Looks like we’re gonna have to go FDR and declare war somewhere - that’ll get the economy going again! Maybe Hollywood stars ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  11 Mar 2010

Related Topics: Maria Shriver,  Haley Barbour

America’s Only Thriving Industry: Internet Terrorism

Those Main Line Muslins have always been trouble. She heard it was a great way to meet lots of Musulmen. Our voiceover guy sounds waaay too much like ORN’s Doyle Redland for me to take this seriously. Everyone needs a hobby It was nice of the gummint ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  11 Mar 2010

Related Topics: Jim Davis

Sugar Plum Fairy Came and Hit the Streets

“Down on your knees again” I’ll see you’re Lou Reed and raise you one Echo and the Bunnyman Those damn lesbians, forcing the school to cancel its prom just because it had enacted backwards rules that violated their rights. At least the school is urging ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  11 Mar 2010

Related Topics: George Will,  Lou Reed,  David Vitter,  John Ensign

With Jobs Scarce, Bounty Hunter Forced To Play Accordion For Tips

Rahm, are you paying attention? /hands Boba two fifties and a pic of Tom Tancredo. That is the second most sadist thing I have every seen. Damn this economy! Should have been dressed as Sy Snootles. “Telling the truth can be dangerous business. Honest ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  10 Mar 2010

Are You One of America’s Main Whores, As Far As Cheating On Your Spouse?

Gee. Mr. Layne, they left out that the top cheating whores who get arrested soliciting sex in public men’s rooms are Republican legislators. Lobbyists deserve what they get but I suspect the real reason that Washington politicians don’t use Ashley ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  10 Mar 2010

Related Topics: U.S. Republican Party

Minority Babies May Outnumber White Babies In America THIS YEAR!!!

Uh oh, America’s white people are about to be outnumbered by, you know, those folks: “Demographers say this year could be the ‘tipping point’ when the number of babies born to minorities outnumbers that of babies born to whites.” NOT COOL, minorities! ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  10 Mar 2010

Related Topics: Dan Rather,  Dick Cheney,  Doug Stanhope

Forgotten Butterstick Released From Chinese Prison

Butterstick’s gonna eat our livers with fava beans and a nice Chianti. Bamboo just isn’t going to cut it, any more. He has the look of any american who finds himself in a 3rd world shithole. WHERE’S MY CABLE TV??? Thank god he got out of DC in time. ...

From KEN LAYNE, Wonkette,  9 Mar 2010

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